Was it Worth it?
by Ersiffa Narman
Summary: After Johnny Lightfoot's untimely demise at the hands of the monster known as Chaos, his friends are left to grieve. No one is taking it as hard as a certain blue blur. NOTE: Contains M/M SLASH. If this is offending to you, then just keep on scrolling.


Was it Worth it?  
Was it worth it?  
That was a question he had asked himself a lot lately. He couldn't answer it no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't say he regretted liberating the world from the tyrant, Dr. Robotnik, but he did wish that he had done it himself. He hated putting his friend's lives on the line. Even if they willingly come with him on his endeavors, he still didn't like it.  
Most people knew Sonic the Hedgehog as a cocky, harsh, but caring hero. They saw him as a figure of hope, a beacon of light in a desolate and dark world. Most people didn't realize, however, that where there's light, there's darkness deep inside. The Sonic most people knew was just an act. Just a front to hide his deepest weakness. Only one person knew how he really was.  
That person was Johnny Lightfoot.  
Johnny was Sonic's best friend, the one he would go to with any problem. If he felt lonely, then he would be comforted by the feeling of Johnny's jacket resting on his shoulders along with his arms wrapped around him in a tight embrace. He never judged Sonic, even if the latter was being irrational. The rabbit kept him in line.  
But now he's dead.  
Sonic just didn't know what to do now that he was gone. He felt that it was his fault. He thought that if his will was just a a little bit stronger, that maybe if he could control his fear, that Johnny would still be alive. He knew that nothing could change what happened, but that still didn't stop him from going to his favorite spot in Emerald and brooding over the circumstances.  
That was where he was now, his gaze directed at the midnight sky. After a few moments of gazing at the stars, he heard someone come up from behind him. He didn't pay attention, not even when the person took a seat next to him. He knew who it was, he just wasn't in the mood to acknowledge her presence just yet. Unfortunately for him, she just wouldn't let him ignore her.  
"You know, we're getting worried about you," the girl spoke, breaking the peaceful silence, "We never see you anymore. Even when you come to the base, you're distant. Standoffish, even." She waited for him to respond, but he just stared at the sky. He was completely motionless other than an occasional blink or ear twitch. Sighing, she continued to speak, "I know Johnny's gone, but we have to move on sometime. He wouldn't want us to grieve for him forever. He'd want us to be happy, to keep his memory alive by fighting. He would-"  
"Amy, you just don't understand!" Sonic aggressively interrupted her, abruptly sitting up and facing her, "He was one of my best friends! He was someone I could rely on, someone I looked up towards." He paused for a moment, trying to calm himself down. After a moment, he looked at her with pain in his eyes, and spoke the most surprising words to the pink hedgehog, "Amy... I loved him. I loved him so much... I just didn't realize it until it was too late."  
Amy looked back at him, a shocked and saddened expression on her face. Now she knew why he was taking Johnny's death so hard. She didn't know what to say. She wondered if she just shouldn't say anything at all, just let him continue speaking. His eyes were so blank, dead even. It looked like he had nothing left to live for. She couldn't take it anymore, she was sick of seeing him like this.  
With a sudden burst of inspiration, she stood up and said, "Sonic, I need you to come with me, I have something to show you." Sonic opened his mouth as if to refuse, but he bit his tongue. He then stood up with her, and they walked in the direction of Emerald Hill Village. Soon, they got to their destination.  
"We're at Johnny's house..." He stated, though it was more like a question. Amy said nothing, just opened the door and held it for her companion. She turned on the light to see a relatively tidy house.  
"Wait here," she commanded, "I need to get something." Sonic didn't say anything, he just sat down on one of the chairs. He noted how much it smelled like Johnny. He relaxed into the chair, dreaming that instead of a chair, it was really the person hat was no longer with him.  
Amy returned, seeing how relaxed Sonic was. She almost wondered if he was asleep. His eyes were closed, his face a peaceful visage. She almost didn't want to disturb him, knowing that this was probably the most rest he had in a week. So she sat in a chair next to him, holding a leather bound book in her hands. This was what she wanted to show Sonic. It was Johnny's diary.  
Johnny had also harbored feelings for Sonic himself. He had talked to Amy many times about it, how he wished Sonic was his. Johnny never tried to tell Sonic, he was too afraid of loosing the lifelong friendship that he had with the hedgehog. Amy shook her head at that, If only he knew that Sonic felt the same way, she thought. She sighed, another feeling of sadness enveloped her.  
She opened the diary up to the last entry, wanting to know what was going through Johnny's mind on the last day of his life. Her eyes widened as she read. She had also discovered another factor of his demise. He knew, she thought, he knew he was going to die. She couldn't read anymore.  
She looked over to the blue blur, he was still sleeping like a log. He had a small smile on his face. That was the first time she had saw him smile since the day Johnny died. She decided to leave Sonic to himself, but not before placing the diary on the chair he was sleeping in. She quietly left the house, shutting the door behind her.  
Sonic awoke the next day in the same chair he had fallen asleep in. He was disoriented for a moment, but he remembered the events from last night. He sighed, and rested his arms on the side of the chair when accidentally knocked something over. He looked over the side of he chair and saw a brown leather bound book. Interested, he picked it up and opened to the first page.  
This is Johnny's diary, he thought. Curious, he decided to read the first entry. He became enraptured in the memories that were written down on the paper, from the defeat of the Death Egg to the day that Mobius was liberated from Dr. Robotnik. He read up until the last entry, which was written the morning of the day he died. The entry read:  
Dear Diary,  
I have a feeling that I don't have much time left alive. This will probably be my last entry, so I want to use it to talk to some of my friends.  
Tails- I want you to know that you are an awesome kid, and you're going to grow up to be a huge hero (you are already a big one!) one day. Good luck!  
Tekno- You're an extremely nice person and you are an absolute genius! No one can count all of the tough spots you have gotten us out of over the years. I hope things go well with you and a certain person.  
Shorty- I just want to let you know that, while we may have had our differences, you are still a respectable person and a great fighter. Don't lose your fiery spirit!  
Porker- I'm gonna miss you, you big oaf. You are a great mechanic, and a good friend.  
Amy- You have come to be one of my best friends. You are the one I run and talk to with any problem. You've put up with my self-consciousness and the days where I just don't feel like getting up. I love you, and I hope you have a good life. I hope you find a guy who will treat you right.  
Sonic- You have captured my heart. I never wanted to tell you this, because I didn't want to ruin the friendship we have. I have always loved you, but I know that you probably don't feel the same way. I... Hope that one day, if you ever read this, don't let it taint your memory of me, please. Anyways, I know how hard you will probably take my death. What ever you do, I want you to keep fighting, stay strong. Don't lose your spirit. I love you... Goodbye.  
Sonic clutched the diary to his chest. His eyes teared up, knowing that Johnny shared his feelings was too much. He knew he would never get a chance to express his own feelings, and that tore him apart. The last part of the letter made him realize how, in his own words, how wimpy, he had been acting. He couldn't keep acting like this, he had to get his life back on track.  
He stepped out of the house to meet the hectic yet peaceful morning bustle of the village, deciding to take a run. As he ran, he saw Tails and Tekno working on some machine. Smirking to himself, he decided to call out to them, "Hey, Pixel Brain! I didn't know you liked working with computers."  
Tails looked over in the direction of Sonic, genuinely surprised and pleased at what he saw. Sonic had a sarcastic grin on his face, a confident demeanor, and an overall cocky appearance about him. Tails donned a grin of his own, and jokingly responded with, "I guess you don't know me that well!"  
"And I don't think I want to know you that well! I'm gonna keep going for a run, we have all of these new zones to explore. You never know what happens there. Catch'a later!"  
After they exchanged goodbyes, Tekno turned to Tails and asked, "Do you think he is really back to himself again?"  
"No, Sonic will probably never be completely the same, but he is definitely back with us, if only just for Johnny." Tails replied, his eyes looking towards the distance.  
It was true, Sonic was back. He was going to make sure that Johnny's death would not be in vain. He was going to make that his mission for the rest of his life.  
Yes, it was true, Sonic the Hedgehog was back.

**A/N: Hello all! Thank you for clicking on my new story! This was inspired by Fleetway's Sonic the Comic and a picture on deviantART depicting an angelic Johnny Lightfoot comforting a distraught Sonic. It was so touching, I just had to write about it. Unfortunately, there are hardly any stories or art about the pairing or the comic itself. Yes, I do realize that because of the pairing choice, I will probably get a couple of flamers and anon reviews that just have the word 'gay' written on it. I personally think it's funny, and you don't anger me in any way. You just make a fool of yourself online. Hope you have a nice day people!**


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